For many women, an orgasm is a fleeting experience; it can even be a mythical creature. Women have asked me, what is an orgasm?
Orgasm is defined as a series of rhythmic contractions or pulsations and vibrations in the vagina. I would add to this that orgasm is about a build up of energy that suddenly starts to move, causing vibrations and involuntary contractions.
Sexologists classically describe three kinds of orgasm:
- The first is called a clitoral orgasm because it is generally brought on by clitoral stimulation. It is characterised by contractions and vibrations in the vagina entrance.
- The Second is a G-Spot Orgasm, which generally occurs from stimulation of the G-Spot. It is characterised by much deeper contractions from deep within the vagina, which can be so deep that they can push anything out of the vagina and also cause female ejaculation or squirting.
- The third is a cervical orgasm, which is when the cervix starts to vibrate and move or contract.
These descriptions are helpful to know, but if you have not experienced it, how can it make sense?
Statistics indicate that 10-15% of women may be anorgasmic but up to 2/3 do not experience regular orgasms. This is a shocking statistic.
Doctors are telling women, you are anorgasmic, there is nothing that anyone can do about it, but I am telling you the opposite. Not only can every woman have orgasms, every woman can have multiple orgasms. In fact orgasm, which is a movement of energy, can be experienced in any part of the body.
So Why Am I Not Having Orgasms?
All this talk about contractions and vibrations, but what does it mean? Simply put, these vibrations are the result of a movement of energy. If you are not having orgasms or enough orgasms, it’s because the energy is not moving.
Energy moves best in a relaxed body. Tension stops the flow of energy and also causes pain.
I guess you might be wondering what I mean by energy. Maybe you have heard the term ’chi’, from Chinese, which refers to life force. It is like electricity, feels like electricity, and is what gives us life. Orgasm actually feels electric anyways.
According to Scientists, women who suffer with anorgasmia also have higher rates of anxiety, fatigue, pain, feeling of guilt, and embarrassment. These conditions all make it hard to relax and cause tension.
It’s good to work on the underlying causes, whether through conventional medical means like psychology or alternative medicine and practices like yoga. However, I am going to share with you a secret practice from Ancient China that is very effective to get that energy flowing.
Part of a kind of meditative practice called Sexual Alchemy, it’s a Taoist practice that works on getting the sexual energy flowing around the body and it’s very powerful. It’s called the Deer Exercise.
Make time and space for you to start doing this, call it your little quiet spot to pamper yourself. It feels great and also is great for your general energy levels.
This is what you do:
- Sitting on your bed with your legs crossed, if possible with a heel covering your vagina (so the energy does not escape) start by rubbing your hands together to warm them.
- Start to massage your breasts in circular movements, clockwise first and then and anti-clockwise. You can do this for up to 10 minutes ideally. You will notice a sensation. It’s the hormones being released into your body. That’s a powerful energy that starts to go to all your glands a rejuvenate you.
- After you finish, massage your ovaries. Feel the energy spread. You can also massage your womb.
- Then massage your entrance of the vagina, slowly and deliberately in clockwise and then anti clockwise directions. Whatever you feel tempted to do, just keep up the slow circles.
- When you finish take in a long deep breath and as you do pull up your pelvic floor tight. Then hold your breath for a similar amount of time and finally release your breath and pelvic floor contraction, exhaling out slowly.
This magical exercise will change your whole body. You will start to feel electric. Keep up the practice and see what happens.
The reason I can tell you that I know it works, I used to be anorgasmic. I could not even comprehend what an orgasm was. My boyfriend would ask me why I didn’t have them and I couldn’t even understand what he meant.
Not only was it an embarrassment, a frustration, I knew I was missing out on something but didn’t even know what. I didn’t put the two together but I also had a stiff and painful body, couldn’t sleep and suffered with anxiety.
Then I discovered Sexual Alchemy and within a few months I was multi-orgasmic. The rest is history.
Guest Post by Jade Lotus. Read about her here
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