#TalkSexChangeLives: The Findings

When we can talk openly about sex, we empower ourselves to live happy, healthy sex lives. That’s what we’ve always believed at Scarlet Ladies. Now, thanks to the #TalkSexChangeLives survey, we have the facts to prove it.

Between July 15th and August 15th 2018, 555 women from around the world responded to our ground breaking #TalkSexChangeLives survey. By analysing their feedback and responses, we’ve created a clearer insight than ever before into women’s attitudes and experience around sex and sexuality.

The results are eye-opening.

85% of women feel empowered by sex

We’ve revealed beyond doubt that talking about sex really does make a difference for women. The ability to talk freely and openly about our sexual experiences and desires is part of a happy, empowered sex life. Yet those of us who have a negative experience of sex are disproportionately likely to have nowhere to go to talk about it. It’s time to end that silence.


Sex doesn’t always make us happy

For many women, sex is a good thing. That’s great. But for up to 15% of us, it’s quite the opposite. Ranging from mild unhappiness, to a 100% rejection of the statement, ‘sex makes me happy’, it’s not unusual to find yourself in a situation where sex feels like a problem. Almost two thirds of women who stated that sex doesn’t make them happy, are in heterosexual relationships, whilst those of us who do not feel empowered by sex, are ten times more likely to have no one to talk to about it, than those who do.

Women’s sexuality is not a dirty secret. It’s part of who we are

At Scarlet Ladies, we’ve always said that female sexuality isn’t something that can be hidden under the covers or brushed aside: it’s something to celebrate. And our survey shows that two out of three women agree that their sexuality is a vital part of their identity. In fact, the older we get, the more it matters: women are almost 50% more likely to agree sexuality is a critical part of their identity at 45, than at 25. Yet still the old taboos keep us quiet.

Up to 50% of gay and bicurious women lack confidence in their sexuality

But what are we so afraid of? Our research shows that one in five women lacks confidence in her sexuality, rising to 50% of all gay and bicurious women. Yet 80% of women identify themselves as sex positive, and 90% of us would never judge another person on the basis of their sexuality.

Sex can be stressful when you’re single

Young, free and single: is there really any such thing? Our research shows that women are disproportionately likely to feel uncomfortable with sex, when they’re aged 25 – 34, and when they’re single. Society is all too ready to label us on the basis of our relationship status and perceived sexual behaviour, but – with 15 different relationship statuses and 13 different sexualities cited by the women who responded to our survey – we can see more clearly than ever before that there’s no such thing as a ‘norm’. The only normal that matters, is the one that feels right for you.

#TalkSexChangeLives: the facts

  1. 85% of women agree that sex empowers them, regardless of whether they’re single, in a relationship, straight, gay, bisexual, or representing one of the other 11 sexualities identified via our survey.
  2. One in three UK women can’t talk freely with their partner(s) about sex
  3. 50% of UK women are (to some degree) uncomfortable talking about masturbation
  4. 40% of single women find sex uncomfortable, compared to 27% of all women.
  5. 15% of all women reported that sex does not make them happy: ranging from mild unhappiness, to 100% disagreement with the statement ‘sex makes me happy’.
  6. One in five UK women lacks confidence in her sexuality
  7. 90% of women disagree with the statement, ‘I’m uncomfortable around people whose sexual preferences are different to mine’
  8. 80% of UK women identify as sex positive
  9. 2 out of 3 UK women agree that sexuality is a big part of who they are
  10. The older we get, the more our sexuality matters: women are almost 50% more likely to agree sexuality is a critical part of their identity at 45, than at 25

Join the conversation!

Experience a first Scarlet Ladies event, free of charge, any time in October and November: find out for yourself how it feels to talk sex and change lives.

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