This post has a simple message: vulvas are awesome!
I know that it shouldn’t need to be said, but there have been a few moments in the past few weeks that have made me stop and wonder if everyone realises this. Vulvas are awesome! They are beautiful and unique and the source of so much pleasure that I am saddened at the number of people who can’t see their body in that way.
The difficulty is that society doesn’t exactly encourage us see vulvas in the way that I do. The fears and vulnerabilities that so many vulva owners feel about their bodies haven’t materialised out of nowhere. Worries about taste and smell and appearance have arisen due to the harsh words of ignorant and cruel people, a porn industry that has created an expectation of ‘perfection’, and because an industry of products that feed these fears has sprung up, from ‘freshening’ hygiene wipes and labioplasty to latex oral sex underwear. Whether they arose from a place of kindness in an attempt to lessen our discomfort, or whether they’re cashing in (like Listerine inventing halitosis in 1920s to sell mouthwash), is not always clear but I am sure that they are doing nothing to make vulva owners feel empowered or proud of their bodies.
These types of products instead seem to confirm the message that there is something about vulvas that needs to be freshened, something about them that needs to be sanitised. That they’re somehow unclean or gross. And, of course, this kind of thinking has led many to see their bodies exactly that way. I know from talking to friends that some can be very hesitant to allow partners to go down on them if they haven’t recently washed or find that oral sex feels more intimate and vulnerable than other sex acts because of the close contact to their genitals. Some still feel that oral sex is gross, even if they accept that their partners might enjoy it.
I’m fortunate; I have never doubted that my husband loves oral sex exactly because of those smells and tastes that so many vulva owners fear , and my previous partners have never made me feel abnormal. It took me a while to enjoy oral fully but that was more because I felt under pressure to come rather than because of worries about my body. Anyway, I’ve always loved the smell of my cunt. When I’m so turned on that I can smell myself, it really takes my arousal up to the next level! I do know oral sex isn’t for everyone but I really hope that no one is missing out because someone has shamed them for their body.
We also need to learn to love our vulvas more because it important to know what is normal for you and then to recognise change. When everyday functions of vulvas and vaginas are seen as disgusting, how are we supposed to educate young people on discharge and what is a healthy colour or odour? When vulvas are seen as gross, it makes it even harder to seek medical help for symptoms such as itching or pain.
Vulva owners, it’s time to change! If you haven’t yet, take a hand mirror and look at your vulva more closely. Think of the pleasure that it has given you and learn to love how it looks too. Gain the confidence of every fuckboy who sends unsolicited dick pics because he thinks his genitals are so great that they are worth sharing with the world! Your vulva is just as awesome and anyone who tells you otherwise is just wrong. And body shaming. And ignorant. And need to be shown the door!
So there it is. Vulvas are awesome!#
Indulging my secret alter-ego.
Generally amusing myself with filthy writing.
So here I am, writing a blog about sex and life, fact and fiction, and all the ridiculous, amazing things that I love! As a junior doctor, I also occasionally write about medicine and the state of the NHS.
Oh, and I take erotic photos too…